We LOVE supporting our kids' ability to climb. We have designated climbing trees, a jungle gym, and Nick even built a massive climbing wall for them. But one very important rule we have around climbing is this: we don't help. When our younger children have wanted a boost up, eager to catch up to their older brother who is climbing with ease high above them, we've always said "no." Why?
By helping children climb, we put them in an unnatural "risk zone," and we take away their instinctual ability to assess risk on their own. Here's what I mean by that:
The Risk Zone
Imagine we're at the base of a ladder. When a baby or toddler is on the ground and cannot physically pull themselves up to the first rung of the ladder: they have no business being on that ladder. If their bodies aren't developed enough to climb up, then they won't be able to climb down, either. If we as parents pick up our child and set them on the 4th rung, then the child will get a false sense of safety at that height, and likely seek out this height on their own in the near future - perhaps when they're not being watched as closely, and they'll be more likely to fall and have accidents. This is where risk assessment comes in.
Risk Assessment
Part of exploring and physical development is learning how to assess risk. This skill shows up in early childhood through these types of physical adventures, but is something that we need throughout our lifetime: the ability to assess a situation independently and make a decision as to whether or not we feel capable/ready/willing to move forward. If someone is taking away that moment of calculation for us, we don't get to exercise that skill at all. With an parent lifting a child to wherever they want to go on the ladder: the child misses out on the chance to think for themselves, take a risk (or not) and experience the consequences.
ENJOYMENT & MEANING
Climbing is a very fun activity for our kids, and they're incredible at it. I attribute this to our rules around climbing, because they have made it SO much more rewarding. We've seen s thwith disappointment that eventually turns to determination. And that day when they CAN make the climb, for the first time -- is a day their faces lights up with pride and accomplishment. Teaching them delayed gratification, personal responsibility, and the truth that with time and strength comes great rewards - is a learning experience we wouldn't give up for the world.
As parents who want to raise active, strong, capable children -- the best gift we can give them is independence when it comes to physical accomplishments. We want our kids to learn how to climb on their own so they can get stronger faster, learn to assess their own risks, to keep them safer while they climb, and to keep the MEANING & important lessons that come with this natural childhood experience.
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I hope you enjoyed this article on NOT teaching kids to climb! This information has been a gift to our own family & I'm so happy to be able to pass it on :)
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